The truth is I did not listen to the whole Rachmaninov song when I posted it on my blog yesterday. I listened to the first 50 seconds. It sounded blog worthy and it went with what I was trying to say. I edited the writing and went to bed.
This morning I rushed to the computer to write a brilliant thought about my parents and my sister and my own blog caught my eye.
Rachmaninov, I thought, what if I go on a 10 minute Rachmaninov Journey? Will I be bored?
Is it something cliché classical. No. I can’t be, it is Rachmaninov… So I turned it on. I let it play. I checked the time at 1 min and 7 seconds. I made it this long. I started writing and forgetting the whole “listening” thing. I am back at 4:46 sec and it is still going.
Listen. (go to my blog from yesterday)
Right now I feel.
Tears. Victory of Human Spirit 8 min 27 sec. Quiet. Talking and Repeating. The end. 10 min. 15 sec.
I watched this video that Christine put on her blog.
Some quotes stood out: Falling in love every day, being seduced. Relate to what I see and react to what I see. Allowing time to be in the world .
Yes. That is it. I am allowing time to be in the world. He chooses to take pictures in order to create a dialogue of today’s fashion. I am choosing to write about my inner experience on this planet at this time.
There is a part in the movie Social Network, that stood out to me. When the creator of napster.com says to the Facebook creator.
A million dollars isn’t cool. You know what’s cool? A billion dollars.
That was my climax. The statement of this fiction movie was in my words, that this moment was the reasons why Facebook is Facebook and not Friendster. Friendster just wanted a millions. If I were to analyze the movie, I would say the main drive for the character was not the billion dollars (it said several times that the character does not care for money) but the power that it represented. The power as a goal is more powerful than money as a goal?
I need that “Aha” moment that drives me forward like the hero of the movie. A greater goal, not power, not money, maybe happiness. The photographer is not doing the blog for now. His greater goal is creating reference material in fashion for people a hundred years from now. I laughed and thought of Rachmaninov. That song was from 1939, in 28 years it will be a 100. It takes a lot of balls to declare that you blog out of millions or billions of blogs is so important, that people a hundred years from now will want to visit it and use it as a reference point of fashion of our generation? That is a powerful statement, photographer! Bravo! That is believing in yourself.
Then I laughed again. A hundred years isn’t cool. You know what is cool, a thousand years.
I do not have the chutzpah to declare that my blog should be read a 100, a 100o or even now as a reference to the human condition. I do want to make some kind of a declaration for why I have a need to do this. It is more than “it makes me happy.” It is something else now.